The Truth About Maternity Pants. The Panel Decoded

I have experimented with every type of waistband on the market to make my baby-bearing, hip-expanding, child-rearing experiences easier, and less itchy. I have found exactly zero pairs of maternity pants that I am not completely sick of wearing after an hour.  Here I have broken down the name of each type of pant in real-world terms that they won’t tell you on the tag. Full Panel- This extra-long and stretchy piece of spandex-lycra-poly mystery blend will hike up over your belly […]

When Enough is Enough. Accepting Limitations

On the twenty-third week of my third pregnancy it occurred to me that I am scared. After a particularly long weekend of running errand after errand with errant kids in tow and wrapping up our weekly odds and ends, I found myself standing at the dining room table set for Sunday dinner, screaming. Screaming in front of my mom, my grandma, my husband and my kids. I was screaming at the scowling face of my three year old. He had spent a lot […]

Because She’s a Girl. A household Conversation About Gender Equality

“When your baby sister is born it’s your job as her biggest brother to protect her.” My husband was having a boy-to-boy conversation with our three year old and one year old about our expected baby girl. I must have been out grocery shopping or pooping (read: hiding in the bathroom facebooking from my phone) when the conversation started. Regardless, when I walked into that sentence it hit my brain like a brick and I kicked into a hormone-fueled rage and let […]

Great Expectations, a gender reveal

Off of the heels of a very successful sonogram appointment my husband kisses me goodbye with tears in his eyes. We both grin like idiots, still not totally sure what to say. He drives off for work, and I rock the baby to sleep, alone with my thoughts. We’ve had two previous children, with two successful anatomy screens and both with the outcome of “It’s a boy!” We experienced the reeling sadness of gender disappointment and the handbasket full of guilt associated […]

No More Happy Meals, EVER!

Have you ever had a “Mommy Dearest” moment, stopping just short of throwing cheeseburgers out of your car window as you drive down the freeway? “No more happy meals! Pee in your cup, I am not stopping this car one more time!” That’s me, being an awesome mom to my own kids and a care provider to my niece. We recently took a trip to a science museum, because we were having terrible weather and what else are you going to do […]

Goldfish, Baby Gates and the Second Born

It is the often joked about tale of the second child; the second child will be the one you forget in the house as you drive off in your car. Your second child will be the one that you feed GMO’s to directly off of your kitchen floor while you do the dishes. Your second child will be stronger than you anticipate because you keep forgetting to take care of them as well as you took care of your first and only […]

Varicose Woes

As the heat of June gathers momentum and melts into the haze of July, I am forced to reckon with them. Like a showdown in a dusty western film from the days of ole, “This here town ain’t big enough for the both of us.” My shorts sit neatly folded at the bottom of a crumpled up pile of laundry. There is only one pair in my wardrobe, with the full stretch maternity panel. As each pregnancy my body endures progresses by […]


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